I’m writing this one in the dark (we haven’t had electricity for a few days), sweating profusely (it was quite warm today), desperately needing a shower (since it’s been over a week), while lizards lurk overhead. So it seems fitting that this one is about some of the daily challenges. I have no desire to idealize my experience in any way, pretending this is some grandiose adventure with no tradeoffs, and I hope this post will offer some more non-glamorous insights into daily life for me. With that said, enjoy hearing about some of the struggles from the comfort of your climate-controlled room, eating whatever food you want.
The first one is the easiest problem on my list: wherever I go, people stare at me. Sometimes it’s fun being the local celebrity, but most of the time it’s a little annoying to have all that attention. Everyone always knows my whereabouts, and I’m always being scrutinized. Random adults will just show up outside my classroom windows to watch my lesson, and I have to send them away. Showering at the public tap leaves me almost in tears, because I hate being stared at while I’m showering. I’m pretty sure people get word that I’m showering and come over to the tap just to stare and comment about how white my skin is.
I see this view every day.
This brings me to my second problem, which is the language barrier. While at this point I can hold a conversation, it gets exhausting to sit in someone’s house for multiple hours, conversing over a cup of tea. It is really mentally draining, especially by the end of the day, but people expect me to be enthusiastic and eager to talk all the time.
Third–and this is a very difficult one–I have as much freedom as a small child in my home country. I’m supposed to ask my host father for permission to go anywhere. I actually try to avoid this one as much as possible, but as soon as I leave my family’s shop to go anywhere, he calls out “Where are you going?” and I have to respond, in front of all the villagers exactly where I’m going. And I hate it. I keep talking about how I had my own apartment in a big US city, but no luck getting more freedom here. Every time he asks me where I’m going, I follow up with, “why do you ask?” and watch as he gets flustered.
My favorite tree
There are many challenges with being a woman here. Almost every day, someone sends their condolences to my parents for only having females. I try not to let the comments get to me, but these little remarks disparaging women are extremely frustrating. Moreover, many families in my village practice menstrual seclusion, where menstruating women aren’t allowed into the main part of the house and are certainly not allowed in the kitchen. This has affected me in various ways that I’ll address in upcoming posts. You can read more about the practice here.
Next is the abundance of wildlife in my room alone. If you want to go on a safari, just stop by and spend the night. My room is very open to the outdoors. While I do have windows with glass in them, they don’t close all the way, and there are four-inch gaps under and over my door, even though I’ve boarded it up as best I can. There are three lizards and two massive spiders that share my room on a full-time basis. I consider us to be the dream team (except one time when one of the spiders found itself on the inside of my mosquito net. Neither of us were happy).
My friend kissing a goat, just because.
About once a week (usually during a thunderstorm), I get an overnight visit from a rat the size of my shoe. I’ve seen this monstrosity scale walls. One time, it actually left droppings on top of my mosquito net, which I was honestly super impressed by. I’ve basically gone door to door in the village asking people for advice on the rat. Every single person said rats are really common and not a big deal. “You are big, rats are small,” was a common refrain. It made me feel a little better, but then one night the rat chewed through a sealed plastic bag and the unopened plastic wrappers of my entire chocolate supply for the year. I found all the chocolate with little bite marks in it behind my chair. When you destroy my entire junk food supply for the year, it’s on, rat friend. I learned my lesson about having anything remotely enjoyable having food (even though it was doubly sealed–the chocolate was unopened and in a sealed plastic bag!), and created some intense traps using only chicken wire, tape, and a sledgehammer. So far, I’ve only trapped a lizard though.
So, those are some of the challenges I’m working through right now. I don’t mean to harp on the negative, but I do want to be realistic. On the other hand, I’ve officially gotten used to cold showers! They no longer bother me. They’re actually close to the level of enjoyment that a hot shower used to bring me (which I would’ve thought impossible a month ago). Also, the massive spiders don’t bother me, which is a big shift for me as well. Watch out world- cold showers and spiders here I come!
Related Posts
